Sir Roland Thorne

The world did not grow quiet all at once. It surrendered to silence one sound at a time. The clash of steel became isolated echoes, ringing faintly across the valley before disappearing into the wind. The cries of wounded men dwindled into ragged breaths, then into nothing at all. Even the horses, once driven into panic by fire and blood, had long since collapsed beside the masters they would never carry home. Only the breeze remained. It wandered aimlessly through broken banners and snapped spear shafts, stirring crimson-stained grass that had been trampled beneath hundreds of boots. The scent of iron clung heavily to the air, mingling with smoke from shattered wagons and abandoned campfires that still smoldered in the distance. The battlefield had become a graveyard. And I stood alone within it. A trembling breath escaped my lips as I tightened my grip around my longsword. My gauntlet had become so slick with blood that I feared the weapon would slip from my grasp at any moment. Whether the blood belonged to me or to the countless men I'd crossed blades with no longer mattered. It was all the same now. Slowly, I turned. Faces. So many familiar faces. Sir Roland rested against the broken wheel of a supply cart, his shield split clean in half. Only yesterday he had complained about the cook burning breakfast, insisting he could prepare better rations himself. The entire company had laughed. Now his eyes stared endlessly toward the heavens. Not far beyond him lay Edwin. The youngest among us. He had spoken constantly during our march north, eager to tell anyone who would listen about the daughter waiting for him at home. He carried a tiny wooden carving of her tucked safely beneath his breastplate, showing it to us every evening with the same proud smile. I wondered... If she'd ever know how bravely her father had fought. One by one, my gaze wandered across the field. Each body carried a memory. A shared meal beside a campfire. A joke exchanged during watch. A song sung terribly off-key after too much ale. Brothers. Not by blood. By choice. The weight pressing against my chest had nothing to do with the sword lodged through my abdomen. It was grief. Heavy. Unforgiving. I lowered myself onto one knee beside Sir Roland, every movement sending fire through my body. The longsword embedded within my stomach shifted ever so slightly, forcing a sharp gasp from between my teeth. Warm blood trickled beneath my armor, soaking the leather beneath. Instinct begged me to pull the blade free. Training forbade it. The sword had become the only thing keeping what remained of me together. I rested a hand against Roland's shoulder. "...We held the line." The words barely carried beyond my lips. "You stubborn fool..." A humorless smile touched my face. "You'd be pleased to know we actually did it." The enemy had fallen. Every last one. The valley they'd sought to claim would remain ours. The villages beyond the hills would wake tomorrow without ever knowing how close death had come knocking upon their doors. It was a victory worthy of songs. Yet there was no one left to sing them. I forced myself back onto shaking legs. The movement nearly sent darkness swallowing my vision. For one terrifying heartbeat I thought I might collapse beside them. Perhaps... That wouldn't be so terrible. My sword slipped from numb fingers and buried itself tip-first into the earth with a dull thud. I no longer possessed the strength to carry it. My gaze drifted toward the distant horizon where the setting sun painted the sky in brilliant shades of amber and crimson. Beautiful. It almost seemed cruel that the world could remain so breathtaking while so many lives had ended beneath it. A slow, weary laugh escaped me. "So..." "This is how it ends." I had imagined death countless times. A knight learns to make peace with it early. One day an arrow would fly straighter than expected. A sword would find the gap in his armor. A horse would stumble. A siege wall would collapse. Death was never a question of if. Only when. I had accepted that long ago. My king had my loyalty. My people had my sword. My life had always been theirs to claim. The thought brought an odd sort of comfort. I had fulfilled my oath. There was honor in that. My knees weakened once more. This time I didn't resist. I sank slowly into the bloodstained grass, staring upward as clouds drifted lazily across an endless blue sky. The breeze brushed gently across my face. For the first time in hours... The pain seemed distant. Muted. As though my body had finally accepted what my mind already knew. This was enough. I could rest. My eyelids began to close. Then... A memory. So small. So simple. Warm fingers intertwined with mine beneath the table of a crowded tavern. A laugh so bright it silenced every conversation around us. The way your eyes sparkled whenever you teased me for polishing my armor more than necessary. "You worry too much," you'd said with that familiar smile. "I simply like looking presentable." "You simply like showing off." "I do not." "You absolutely do." The memory drew the faintest chuckle from my cracked lips. Then came another. The morning I'd ridden away. You had walked beside my horse until the city gates. You tried to smile. You truly did. But I saw the fear hidden behind your eyes. Before I left, you'd reached for my hand. Not to stop me. Never to stop me. Only to hold it for one last moment. "Promise me something." "Anything." Your voice had been barely above a whisper. "...Come home." Three words. No grand speech. No impossible request. Just... Come home. My eyes flew open. The air rushed painfully back into my lungs. "No..." The whisper scraped against my throat. "No." My hand clenched into the dirt beneath me. "I promised." Another breath. Another. Pain exploded through every inch of my body as I forced myself upright once more. Every muscle screamed in protest. My vision blurred. The world tilted. Still... I stood. "I am not finished." Not while you were waiting. Not while there was still a road leading home. Even if I had to crawl every inch of it. I turned away from the battlefield, leaving behind the brothers who had become my family. "I'll see you again." The promise was meant for them. And perhaps... For myself. Ahead of me, the ancient forest stretched endlessly beneath the evening light, its towering trees standing like silent guardians watching over the world beyond the carnage. Somewhere on the other side... You were waiting. So with a sword still buried through my body and little more than stubborn hope keeping my heart beating... I took my first step toward home. The first few steps were the hardest. Not because of the pain. Pain had become a constant companion hours ago. No... It was because every instinct within me begged me to stop. To lie back down upon the battlefield beside my brothers. To surrender. The weight of my armor seemed to double with every passing moment. My shield had long since been abandoned among the fallen, my longsword remained planted in the earth where I'd left it, and even my cloak had been discarded after becoming too heavy with blood. Yet the sword through my abdomen remained. An unwilling companion. Every careful step caused the blade to shift ever so slightly, sending sharp waves of agony through my body. My breathing became shallow, measured, each inhale an effort to avoid jostling the steel that kept me alive as much as it threatened to end me. Still... I walked. The forest welcomed me with a cool breeze that carried the scent of pine and damp earth. Towering oaks stretched high above, their branches weaving together into a vast emerald canopy. Sunlight filtered through the leaves in scattered beams of gold, painting shifting patterns across the moss-covered path before me. The silence here was different. Gentle. Alive. Birdsong echoed somewhere high above. A squirrel darted across a fallen log, pausing only long enough to study the strange armored figure stumbling through its home before vanishing into the undergrowth. Life continued. The world had not ended simply because men had chosen to kill one another. I found that strangely comforting. One hand rested against the hilt protruding from my stomach, more to steady the blade than from any hope of easing the pain. My gauntlet came away slick with fresh blood. "...Not much farther." It was a lie. I had no idea how much farther remained. Home could have been ten miles away. Or fifty. But lies become necessary when hope begins to fade. So I lied to myself. Again. And again. The forest floor sloped gently downward, giving way to a narrow stream that wound between smooth stones. Crystal-clear water danced over the rocks, its cheerful melody so wonderfully at odds with the horrors I'd left behind. I knelt. Or rather... I attempted to. Halfway down, my legs gave out entirely. I hit the ground harder than intended, a strangled gasp escaping my lips as the sword shifted within me. For several long moments, I simply lay there, cheek pressed against cool moss while I fought to catch my breath. "...Get up." Nothing. "...Get up." The command sounded weaker this time. My arms trembled violently as I pushed myself onto one elbow. Failure. I collapsed again. A humorless laugh escaped me. "So this..." I coughed, crimson staining the moss beneath me. "...is what defeats me?" Not an army. Not the warrior who'd driven his blade through my body. A patch of damp earth. The thought was almost insulting. I reached toward the stream instead, scooping icy water into my hands. It tasted sweeter than any wine I'd ever known. I splashed more across my face, allowing the chill to chase away the haze creeping into my thoughts. For a little while... It worked. I managed to stand once more. One foot. Then the other. Step. Breathe. Step. Breathe. My world shrank to those two simple actions. Everything else disappeared. Time became meaningless. The sun drifted lower, casting warm amber light through the trees. Shadows stretched long across the forest floor. Several times I found myself speaking aloud. Not because anyone could hear. But because silence had begun to feel lonely. "You remember..." I smiled faintly. "...when you tried teaching me to dance?" A branch caught against my shoulder as I stumbled past. "I stepped on your foot." Twice. "No..." A tired chuckle escaped me. "Five times." You'd laughed so hard tears had formed in your eyes. The musicians had stopped playing simply to watch. I had wanted the ground to swallow me whole. Yet you only smiled. "You fight like a legend." You'd whispered afterward. "But you dance like a frightened horse." "I was wearing armor." "You were not." "...Details." The memory warmed me more than the evening sun ever could. I could almost hear your laughter carried upon the breeze. Almost. As the hours passed, the forest grew quieter. Not empty. Peaceful. Golden butterflies drifted lazily between patches of wildflowers that dotted the woodland floor. A family of deer watched me from a distant hillside, their ears twitching curiously before they bounded gracefully into the trees. None of them fled in panic. None feared me. Perhaps they sensed I no longer possessed the strength to harm anything. Perhaps... They pitied me. I couldn't say. Eventually the path disappeared altogether. Roots twisted beneath my boots, forcing me to move even slower. My vision blurred once more. Dark spots danced at the edges of my sight. The trees themselves seemed to sway gently, though I could no longer tell whether they truly moved or if it was merely exhaustion claiming my senses. "I'll make it..." Another step. "I promised..." Another. "...Just..." The words failed me. My legs buckled. Again. This time I didn't strike the ground. Instead, my shoulder caught against the broad trunk of an ancient oak. Its bark felt rough beneath my fingertips. Solid. Steady. For a moment, I rested there, forehead pressed against the tree as I fought to remain conscious. "I'm trying." The confession escaped in little more than a whisper. "I'm trying..." Not to the tree. To you. I imagined you waiting by the window of our little home, glancing toward the road each time footsteps echoed beyond the gate. Perhaps you'd already begun worrying. Perhaps you'd convinced yourself I was merely delayed. I prayed that was all it was. Delay. Not loss. The wind stirred once more. Leaves rustled softly overhead. A handful drifted lazily to the ground around my feet, carried by an unseen breeze toward a narrow opening between the trees. I lifted my head. There... Had that path always been there? I couldn't remember. The opening was little more than a break in the dense woodland, framed by ivy-covered stone and wild roses climbing ancient roots. Beyond it... Light. Soft. Golden. Beautiful. Almost instinctively, my feet began moving again. The air grew cooler. Sweeter. The scent of pine slowly gave way to wild lavender, blooming jasmine, and countless flowers whose names I did not know. The sound reached me next. Water. Not the gentle babbling of the stream. A waterfall. Its soothing roar echoed through the trees like a lullaby, washing away the distant ghosts of battle until all I could hear was the endless rhythm of falling water. The trees gradually thinned. The light grew brighter. One final step carried me beyond the forest's embrace... ...and my breath caught in my throat. Before me stretched a hidden meadow unlike anything I had ever witnessed. Thousands upon thousands of wildflowers blanketed the earth in vibrant colors—crimson poppies, bluebells, daisies as white as fresh snow, and golden blossoms that shimmered beneath the fading sun. Butterflies floated through the warm evening air in graceful spirals, their delicate wings catching the light like fragments of stained glass. At the meadow's heart stood a waterfall cascading from towering stone cliffs into a crystal-clear pool. Mist rose gently from its surface, catching the sunlight and scattering tiny rainbows that danced among the flowers. It looked untouched. Untainted. As though war had never existed. As though sorrow itself could not find this place. "...Beautiful..." The word escaped before I even realized I'd spoken. A trembling smile found my lips. I took one final step into the sea of flowers. Then another. My knees finally surrendered. The blossoms bent beneath my weight, cushioning my fall as I collapsed onto my back. Above me, the sky burned with shades of gold, rose, and violet. Butterflies drifted overhead without fear, one settling briefly upon the battered chestplate that had somehow carried me this far. The cool mist from the waterfall kissed my face. It felt... Wonderful. My breathing slowed. The pain began to fade. Not because the wound had healed. Because I could no longer feel it. "...Maybe..." A peaceful sigh escaped me. "...Maybe this is enough." The roar of the waterfall softened into a gentle lullaby. Darkness did not frighten me. It embraced me. The ache that had burned through every bone, every breath, every heartbeat slowly melted away until it felt as though I floated upon calm waters instead of lying broken upon a bed of flowers. How peaceful. How... warm. Somewhere nearby, the waterfall continued its endless song. Its gentle rhythm became distant, almost dreamlike, until I could no longer tell where the sound ended and silence began. Then... A voice. Faint. Fragile. Carried upon the breeze. My name. Someone was calling my name. Again. Closer this time. There was urgency woven into the words, though I couldn't understand why. Hadn't the battle ended? Hadn't I already done all that was asked of me? The voice trembled. It sounded... afraid. Don't cry. I wanted to say the words aloud, but my lips refused to obey. Please... Don't cry. A warmth settled against my hand. Soft. Gentle. Fingers intertwining with mine. The touch was impossibly familiar. I knew those hands. Even now. Even here. Slowly, with more effort than raising my sword had ever demanded, I forced my eyes open. The world returned as a blur of golden light. Sunlight filtered through drifting mist, painting everything in a soft, ethereal glow. Flowers swayed gently around me, their sweet fragrance carried on the cool breath of the waterfall. Butterflies danced overhead, unbothered by the sorrow that seemed to linger just beyond my reach. A figure knelt beside me. At first, I couldn't make out their face. Only light. Radiant. Almost blinding. An angel. Of course. Who else would wait for a weary knight at the end of his journey? Slowly, the figure reached toward me. Gentle hands loosened the weathered strap beneath my chin. The weight of my helmet disappeared, lifted away with such care that I almost laughed. Fresh air brushed against my face. It had been so long since I'd felt it. A cool breeze stirred through my sweat-dampened hair. Then... The light shifted. And I saw you. No... Not you. An angel wearing your face. It was the only explanation my tired mind could offer. How cruel heaven could be. To greet me with the one person I'd wanted most. A tear slipped from the corner of my eye, tracing a warm path down my temple before disappearing into the petals beneath me. I smiled anyway. Even if this was only a dream... It was a beautiful one. With trembling effort, I lifted my hand. The journey felt endless. My arm weighed as much as my armor once had. Still... You met me halfway. Your cheek rested against my palm. Warm. So wonderfully warm. Not cold marble. Not an illusion. Living warmth. My thumb brushed gently across your skin as though committing every detail to memory one final time. "I knew..." I whispered, my voice scarcely louder than the rustling flowers. "...Heaven would never dare create someone more beautiful than you." A weak laugh escaped me. It ended in a quiet cough. "You always did make the angels jealous." Another tear followed the first. Not born from pain. But relief. "I tried..." The words caught in my throat. "I truly... tried..." Every mile. Every step. Every ragged breath through the forest. "I remembered..." My smile softened. "Your laugh." The corners of my eyes crinkled faintly. "The way you'd steal food from my plate... and insist it tasted better because it wasn't yours." A breath. Shallow. Unsteady. "The way you'd scold me whenever I polished my armor instead of resting..." Another tiny laugh. "You were always right." My fingers trembled against your cheek. "I was showing off." The confession earned the faintest smile. Even now... You were still beautiful when you smiled. Just as beautiful as the day we'd first met. Perhaps even more so. The world around us faded once more. Not into darkness. Into light. Golden rays spilled across the meadow, setting the waterfall ablaze with shimmering brilliance. Butterflies drifted lazily through the air before settling among the flowers, while the wind carried countless petals dancing around us like blessings whispered by the earth itself. I could no longer feel the sword. Nor the blood. Nor the weight of my armor. Only you. "...You're crying..." My thumb brushed clumsily beneath your eye, trying to wipe away tears I could barely see. "Oh..." A weary smile crossed my lips. "Please don't." "You've always been far too beautiful to cry." I wished I had the strength to brush every tear away. To pull you into my arms. To kiss your forehead and tell you everything would be alright. Instead... My hand began to slip. Weakness returned like the tide. You caught it before it could fall. Of course you did. You always caught me. "I made you a promise..." The words were little more than air now. "So..." Another slow breath. "...Don't be angry..." "I came home." The breeze stirred once again, carrying the scent of wildflowers between us. My eyelids grew unbearably heavy. Yet somehow... I managed one last smile. The same smile I'd worn the first time I'd nervously introduced myself to you. The same smile you'd teased me about for years afterward. "My love..." My voice cracked, fragile as autumn leaves. "...If this truly is heaven..." A pause. "...Then let me stay like this a little longer." Another tear escaped. "...Just until I've memorized your face all over again." My eyes slowly drifted shut. Not in surrender. But in trust. The last thing I felt was your hand wrapped tightly around mine. The last thing I heard was your voice calling my name. Again. And again. As though refusing to let the world take me. Far away, somewhere beyond the meadow, a bird burst into song. The wind danced through the flowers. The waterfall never stopped singing. And for the first time since the battle had begun... I no longer walked toward home. I had found it. The scent of flowers filled every breath. For the first time since the battle began... I felt no fear. No grief. Only peace. My eyes slowly drifted closed. And somewhere beyond the darkness... I thought I heard someone calling my name. Darkness did not frighten me. It embraced me. The ache that had burned through every bone, every breath, every heartbeat slowly melted away until it felt as though I floated upon calm waters instead of lying broken upon a bed of flowers. How peaceful. How... warm. Somewhere nearby, the waterfall continued its endless song. Its gentle rhythm became distant, almost dreamlike, until I could no longer tell where the sound ended and silence began. Then... A voice. Faint. Fragile. Carried upon the breeze. My name. Someone was calling my name. Again. Closer this time. There was urgency woven into the words, though I couldn't understand why. Hadn't the battle ended? Hadn't I already done all that was asked of me? The voice trembled. It sounded... afraid. Don't cry. I wanted to say the words aloud, but my lips refused to obey. Please... Don't cry. A warmth settled against my hand. Soft. Gentle. Fingers intertwining with mine. The touch was impossibly familiar. I knew those hands. Even now. Even here. Slowly, with more effort than raising my sword had ever demanded, I forced my eyes open. The world returned as a blur of golden light. Sunlight filtered through drifting mist, painting everything in a soft, ethereal glow. Flowers swayed gently around me, their sweet fragrance carried on the cool breath of the waterfall. Butterflies danced overhead, unbothered by the sorrow that seemed to linger just beyond my reach. A figure knelt beside me. At first, I couldn't make out their face. Only light. Radiant. Almost blinding. An angel. Of course. Who else would wait for a weary knight at the end of his journey? Slowly, the figure reached toward me. Gentle hands loosened the weathered strap beneath my chin. The weight of my helmet disappeared, lifted away with such care that I almost laughed. Fresh air brushed against my face. It had been so long since I'd felt it. A cool breeze stirred through my sweat-dampened hair. Then... The light shifted. And I saw you. No... Not you. An angel wearing your face. It was the only explanation my tired mind could offer. How cruel heaven could be. To greet me with the one person I'd wanted most. A tear slipped from the corner of my eye, tracing a warm path down my temple before disappearing into the petals beneath me. I smiled anyway. Even if this was only a dream... It was a beautiful one. With trembling effort, I lifted my hand. The journey felt endless. My arm weighed as much as my armor once had. Still... You met me halfway. Your cheek rested against my palm. Warm. So wonderfully warm. Not cold marble. Not an illusion. Living warmth. My thumb brushed gently across your skin as though committing every detail to memory one final time. "I knew..." I whispered, my voice scarcely louder than the rustling flowers. "...Heaven would never dare create someone more beautiful than you." A weak laugh escaped me. It ended in a quiet cough. "You always did make the angels jealous." Another tear followed the first. Not born from pain. But relief. "I tried..." The words caught in my throat. "I truly... tried..." Every mile. Every step. Every ragged breath through the forest. "I remembered..." My smile softened. "Your laugh." The corners of my eyes crinkled faintly. "The way you'd steal food from my plate... and insist it tasted better because it wasn't yours." A breath. Shallow. Unsteady. "The way you'd scold me whenever I polished my armor instead of resting..." Another tiny laugh. "You were always right." My fingers trembled against your cheek. "I was showing off." The confession earned the faintest smile. Even now... You were still beautiful when you smiled. Just as beautiful as the day we'd first met. Perhaps even more so. The world around us faded once more. Not into darkness. Into light. Golden rays spilled across the meadow, setting the waterfall ablaze with shimmering brilliance. Butterflies drifted lazily through the air before settling among the flowers, while the wind carried countless petals dancing around us like blessings whispered by the earth itself. I could no longer feel the sword. Nor the blood. Nor the weight of my armor. Only you. "...You're crying..." My thumb brushed clumsily beneath your eye, trying to wipe away tears I could barely see. "Oh..." A weary smile crossed my lips. "Please don't." "You've always been far too beautiful to cry." I wished I had the strength to brush every tear away. To pull you into my arms. To kiss your forehead and tell you everything would be alright. Instead... My hand began to slip. Weakness returned like the tide. You caught it before it could fall. Of course you did. You always caught me. "I made you a promise..." The words were little more than air now. "So..." Another slow breath. "...Don't be angry..." "I came home." The breeze stirred once again, carrying the scent of wildflowers between us. My eyelids grew unbearably heavy. Yet somehow... I managed one last smile. The same smile I'd worn the first time I'd nervously introduced myself to you. The same smile you'd teased me about for years afterward. "My love..." My voice cracked, fragile as autumn leaves. "...If this truly is heaven..." A pause. "...Then let me stay like this a little longer." Another tear escaped. "...Just until I've memorized your face all over again." My eyes slowly drifted shut. Not in surrender. But in trust. The last thing I felt was your hand wrapped tightly around mine. The last thing I heard was your voice calling my name. Again. And again. As though refusing to let the world take me. Far away, somewhere beyond the meadow, a bird burst into song. The wind danced through the flowers. The waterfall never stopped singing. And for the first time since the battle had begun... I no longer walked toward home. I had found it.

更新 September 23, 2026